Ever wondered what gets under your server’s skin? While you may think your biggest restaurant crime is dropping a napkin on the floor, there’s a whole secret list of things that make servers across the world want to sprint for the kitchen. Thanks to hundreds of service industry veterans sharing their gripes on Quora, we now have the inside scoop. Here are the top 10 things restaurant servers secretly hate most about customers—and if you recognize yourself here, maybe it’s time to break some habits!
Running Your Server Ragged
- Ordering extra items one at a time, right as the server drops the last dish, is at the top of the list. Kane Mantyla explains on Quora how nothing frustrates servers more: the endless back-and-forth across the dining room, all because a table spreads out their requests. Servers unanimously agreed it’s exhausting. So, if you want a happy server (and food that arrives before dessert), order as much as you can in a single go. Your server, and their step count, will thank you.
The Art of Getting Attention (Or, Please Don’t Snap Your Fingers)
- You may have heard “the customer is king,” but apparently not all royals got the memo on manners. Servers on Quora are adamant: finger snapping is beyond rude. Sure, you want attention, but a glance, a polite nod, or, better yet, a big beaming smile works wonders—and doesn’t make your server feel like a household pet.
Unhelpful Help and Chaos at the Table
- Trying to be helpful by stacking plates at the end of your meal? Not so fast. Servers rank disordered plate piles among their top three pet peeves. The intention is good, but an unstable tower of dirty dishes is a disaster waiting for a spectacular crash (and a deeply embarrassed busboy). Tom Wilson chimes in: “I appreciate the effort, but usually, I have to reorganize the pile anyway—otherwise, catastrophe is inevitable…” Let the server do the stacking. Trust them, they’ve had training (and stronger wrists).
- Chaotic children on the run another server nightmare. Not all restaurants come with kids’ play areas, and most servers didn’t sign up to be impromptu babysitters. As Lemanski admits, “Children can be adorable, but I didn’t sign up for babysitting.” Servers trade stories of near-trips and tightrope walks with trays, thanks to kids darting between tables. A reminder: a restaurant is not a playground—unless you’ve found a really avant-garde establishment.
The “Best Table” Dilemma and the Hunger Games
- Apparently, everyone wants the “best” table, without considering that the other diners might have had the same brilliant idea. Tala from Quora puts it simply: Finding an ideal spot for every single guest is impossible. Servers have their own seating map logic too—those “strategic” seats are about service flow, not seating politics.
- Complaining about hunger is another recurring saga. Servers are not the chef (and definitely don’t control the mystical forces of kitchen speed). One user vented, “I’m not the cook! It’s not my fault!” Worst of all, says Tala, are the prospective diners still waiting at the door: irritation grows with every minute they wait, but servers remind us—unless they can convince eaters to chew faster, there’s not much they can do.
Petty Gripes: Borrowed Pens and Screen Time Faux Pas
- Borrowing a pen happens so often servers actually mention it as a minor grievance. It’s a small favor—just remember to return it, unless you want to contribute to your server’s growing collection of misplaced writing implements (and sighs).
- Then there are phones. Kate on Quora finds it “complicated” to deliver food when phones clutter the table. Even more irksome: ordering while glued to your screen, eyes unfazed by real life. Servers cut slack to guests waiting to be seated, but during the meal, a little eye contact goes a long way for smoother service.
The Tipping Point
- To round out the list, we come to the (un)timely matter of tipping—or rather, not tipping. Servers on Quora confess that it’s truly irksome when, after all the attention, care, and marathon service, certain guests leave nothing behind but an empty table. Kevin sums it up: some people “demand a lot and give nothing in return. They talk, take up your time, and then leave without tipping. Do they not know how it works—or are they just super stingy?”
So, what’s the lesson here? The next time you dine out, a little bit of awareness and kindness can turn a server’s day from tear-your-hair-out to genuinely grateful. Your order (and tip) may just be remembered—for all the right reasons.
William is the creative mind behind Aversa Outdoor — a lifelong outdoor enthusiast with a deep love for gardening, home design, and everything in between.
He grew up surrounded by nature, spending weekends helping in the family garden and learning the joy of building things by hand. Over time, that passion turned into a mission: helping others create spaces they love, inside and out.
With Aversa Outdoor, William shares practical tips, fresh ideas, and a laid-back approach to home and garden living. Whether you’re planting your first herbs, planning a patio makeover, or just looking for inspiration, he’s here to make it simple, rewarding, and a little bit fun.
When he’s not in the garden or sketching his next DIY project, you’ll find him exploring local nurseries, chasing the perfect sunset light, or sipping coffee on the porch with a good book.
